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All Things New

9/25/2015

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Our past can destroy our future if we let it. I believe this is even truer in marriage. When two adults come together to share their lives as one, it is the enemy’s job to try and tear their souls apart. Unfortunately, most of us have had previous relationships that weren’t of God and definitely not in agreement to His word. By His grace and mercy He gives us another chance to get it right and have an honorable covenant blessed by Him. When two come together, the enemy will use those past hurts to try to divide the relationship. I believe that God restored me after my divorce from my first husband and my past relationships. I believe that he made me whole and prepared me to be a wife according to His standards. This doesn’t mean that I am perfect or that the enemy doesn’t ever try to come in and torment me with things from my past. There are times when something may happen that triggers an old memory and the enemy will begin to speak. He will try to torment me with wounds from the past and try to convince me that similar things are happening. I have to choose to renew my mind. I can’t walk around paranoid that my marriage will end up like my past. I can’t assume that my husband is doing things just because my ex did them.  I can’t let the enemy flood my thoughts with memories of pain and sin.

James 4:7(NKJV)

Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you

We must resist the temptation to dwell on the past. Our past is nailed to the cross and covered by the blood of Jesus!

Philippians 4:8 (NKJV)

[ Meditate on These Things ] Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.

Our thoughts should be fixed on truth. They should be noble, just, pure and lovely.  We have to evaluate our situations with the truth of the present. We can’t make our spouses accountable for foolishness that took place in our past. If there is a place of hurt, then it needs to be addressed. First, I suggest that we look at our hearts and understand why we are hurt so that we can clearly articulate to our spouse. They can’t read our minds and can better respond if we are completely honest. We shouldn’t sugar coat the truth, but we do need to speak with love. Our past makes us who we are by the lessons that we learn but our mistakes don’t define us. How we overcome is what sets us apart. God binds up our wounds and restores our souls. He makes all things new.

 

2 Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV)

17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.

Isaiah 43:18-19 (NKJV)

18 “Do not remember the former things,
Nor consider the things of old.
19 Behold, I will do a new thing,
Now it shall spring forth;
Shall you not know it?
I will even make a road in the wilderness
And rivers in the desert.


We are new and our situations are new when we are in Christ. The results we had in the past will not affect our future because we are presented with unique ways of deliverance. Only God can make a road in the wilderness and a river in the desert, but we must believe Him for it. We must stop listening to the voice of the enemy that is trying to break us apart from the one God brought us together with.

Father, we thank You that You cover our past with Your blood. We are a new creation in You. Forgive us for letting our past affect our present. Show us how to evaluate our situations through Your eyes and not through our mistakes. Help us keep our thoughts stayed on You and all of Your goodness. The enemy has to flee because we submit to You and Your plans for our marriage. Help us be as one as we continue our journey through marriage. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen!

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If Your Words Were Money......

9/18/2015

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All my life, my mouth has gotten me in trouble. I have always had something to say, questions to ask, and opinions to give. This can be good in instances when no one else will speak up for a cause and also when trying to gain understanding, but some things are just better left unsaid. I have had to learn when to be quiet.

Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7 (KJV)

 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

7 A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

Sometimes this has been extremely hard for me. The gifts are given without repentance. God gives us gifts yet before we know how to use them and He doesn’t take them back when we misuse them. Just as now God will allow me to see the hurt places in people’s hearts so that I can effectively pray and prophesy to them, I used to see those places (before salvation) and use my words to cut people and win arguments. We all have an advantage in this area when being married. When we get married, we become one. We are joined on a spiritual level that gives us an advantage of knowing the exact things that can break our spouse. We have to be very careful and wise when expressing ourselves.

Proverbs 29:11 (NKJV)

11 A fool vents all his feelings,[a]But a wise man holds them back.

The key word in this scripture is all. Communication is key, but all of our feelings don’t need to be shared because we don’t always first filter them through God’s Word and His love. Sometimes, it is best to be quiet and pray. Check our own hearts and motives and evaluate why we are feeling a certain way. If we are genuinely hurt by a wrong doing, then it’s okay to go to them in love and let God do the rest, but sometimes there is power in praying and watching God deal with it without us saying a word. Prayer is key. If we are just mad because we didn’t get our way, then we just need to pray and ask God to deal with our own hearts. Our words are important and should be used sparingly. Our words hold great power. If we think of our words like money, would we be wasting them on every fleeting thing or would we be saving them on the things that matter and hold value?

Proverbs 18:20-21 (NKJV)

20 A man’s stomach shall be satisfied from the fruit of his mouth;
From the produce of his lips he shall be filled.


Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit.

Our words have the power to change our situation. Do we want to fill ourselves with bitterness and anger coming out of it, or do we want to fill ourselves with joy and love? We can speak life to our marriages. We can speak life to our children. We can speak life to all things around us. Our words are powerful weapons that can change lives, situations, and atmospheres. We need to treat our words like every one of them matters.

Ephesians 4:29 (NKJV)

29 Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.

We need to be edifying our spouse. We want to impart grace into their lives. We need to speak the Word of God over them and express our feelings in love.

Father, we thank You for Your Word that gives our marriage instructions to stay strong. Help us continue to seek you for all the answers that we need. Thank You for the gift and weapon of our words. Forgive us for wasting them and not always using them to build, encourage, and impart grace. Help us know when to speak and when to be silent. Help us pray always and filter our emotions through Your Word. Let our words speak life to everything around us. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen!

 

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Single, Married, Finding Balance

9/11/2015

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At the time I accepted Jesus as my Savior, I was going through the separation/divorce process with my first husband. I prayed, cried out to God, and even got him to go to counseling, but he just wasn’t ready to be what a husband should. I repented for my part in the failure of our marriage and God started the process of healing my wounds and making me whole. My focus was on absorbing everything that I could about God’s word and what it meant for my life. My girls were old enough to be independent, so while they played or watched television, I studied. I would have books laid across my bed and different versions of the bible scattered everywhere. I was seeking understanding, revelation, and most of all wisdom. I wanted to know what God created me for. Sometimes I would pray all night. When I did sleep, I was having many dreams that would bring me revelation and instructions. These were awesome times, though I still desired to be married. It took three years for my divorce to be made final, but I knew that once it was final, I would marry again. I believe because I let God deal with my hurts and pains those three years, He sent me a husband quickly. Now, dating while saved should only bring one result; marriage. If you don’t see yourself marrying the person you are dating then it is better to cut ties before wasting too much time and getting caught up in the snares of the enemy. Our sexual desires come from God and are made for marriage. It is easy to fall in the trap of fornication when you are physically attracted to someone. This is especially true if you have been sexually active in the past. I don’t care how self controlled you are or how much you love Jesus, when the temptation comes nobody is exempt. The lust of the flesh is powerful. That’s way it is important to not put yourself in situations of compromise. You should also be accountable to someone that will pray for and with you to help keep you on track.

1 Corinthians 7:9

But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn

God would rather see us marry than fall into fornication. When we share our bodies with someone else and then separate, it does damage to our souls. He wants us to be whole. Thank God for his mercy and forgiveness that he gives us another chance through repentance. When/if we do sin we can ask him to cleanse us and he will, but we must turn from our sin and follow him. Don’t get stuck in your sin or you will get stuck in your circumstances. With that being said, marriage is a big change from being single in the Lord!

1 Corinthians 7:32-34New King James Version (NKJV)

32 But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord—how he may please the Lord. 33 But he who is married cares about the things of the world—how he may please his wife. 34 There is[a] a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world—how she may please her husband.

The hours of study, the all night praying and serving the Lord in every opportunity had to change when I got married. I had to now be concerned with pleasing my husband. I’ve been pregnant or breastfeeding since we’ve been married. The time and energy that I once dedicated to Lord has been greatly reduced. The message version explains it like this:

1 Corinthians 7:32-35The Message (MSG)

32-35 I want you to live as free of complications as possible. When you’re unmarried, you’re free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master. Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention. The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I’m trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder. All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of distractions.

There are many distractions in married life. My assignments have changed but my focus is the same. How can I please the Lord in what I do? What does the bible say about being a wife and mother? The key is knowing your season, knowing your assignment, and making time to pray and get instructions from the Lord. We must have balance. The distractions will come, but we must press past them knowing that God is with us and will reward us when we diligently seek him. We can’t neglect or spouse, but we also can’t neglect God. It might look different than it did when you were single, but God will honor the time you set aside for Him. Wash the dishes and pray. Change a diaper and thank God. Cook dinner and rejoice. Put God in everything and he will surely be with you in everything that you do!

Father we thank You for the season that You have us in. Thank you for never leaving us even in times of our own foolishness. Forgive us for not always obeying your word or being content in the season that you have us. Teach us how to have balance in pleasing you and our spouse/children. We want to do everything as we are doing it unto You. Show us what that looks like according to Your word. Make us doers of Your word and not just hearers only. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen!

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Unexpected Circumstances

9/4/2015

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There are times in marriage that surprising challenges can take us off guard.  These situations can stem from emergencies at work, a loved one being sick, unexpected family issues (immediate or extended), loss of job, major car repair, and well…. I’m sure you get the picture. We are usually are taken off guard because our plans on how we believe things should be going are all ready set in our hearts and mind. We usually have strategy formed on how to complete our goals and boundaries on our time, resources, and finances. When these situations arise, it puts a monkey wrench in our plans. It causes us to be aggravated, discouraged, and even fearful that our goals won’t be met. All these feelings cause chaos in our hearts and minds, but Jesus came and died for us so that we may have peace in every situation.

John 14:27 (AMP)

27 Peace I leave with you; My [own] peace I now give and bequeath to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. [Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and disturbed; and do not permit yourselves to be fearful and intimidated and cowardly and unsettled.]

So when these situations arise, most of us probably need to first repent (laughing but very serious) because we have probably responded badly to the interference of our plans. The next thing we must do is calmly evaluate the situation and how it affects what we are trying to accomplish. Then without worry, we can come to God with strategic requests already believing and thanking Him because we know that He will deliver us and work things out for our good. We should also calmly talk things out with our spouse and pray for them and with them. We all react to situations differently and can’t assume that they will feel the same way. Communication is key.

Philippians 4:6-7 (NKJV)

6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Prayer will give us peace in the midst of chaos. Jesus left us with the Holy Spirit to comfort us and give us peace for every situation. We must activate our faith through prayer and soaking in the word of God so that this peace will be able to guard our hearts and minds.

Romans 14:16-18 (NKJV)

16 Therefore do not let your good be spoken of as evil; 17 for the kingdom of God is not eating and drinking, but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. 18 For he who serves Christ in these things[a] is acceptable to God and approved by men.

The world is full of chaos and troubling circumstances. Being a citizen in the kingdom of God gives us access to not only peace, but righteousness and joy. When we respond in this way not only does God accept our behavior, but man (even our spouse) will approve it. This creates an atmosphere of peace. The enemy knows how to push our buttons. He is always trying to find ways to catch us of guard and make us sin in our anger and frustration. We all make mistakes and have expectations for things to happen in a certain way. Sometimes we don’t understand why and even want to give up. God wants us to keep pressing forward. He knows what’s best and will use every situation to work out for our good. We learn from our process and are able to give others wisdom to help them grow.

Romans 8:28 (NKJV)

28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

Father, we thank You for Your peace. We thank You that You are concerned with everything that concerns us and also know what is best for us. Forgive us for not being flexible and responding in our frustration instead of seeking You first. Help us be led by the Holy Spirit and seek You first in all things. We know that You are our deliverer and You will never leave us to fail. Show us how to learn from every process and use it to bless others. Let us not be consumed with the chaos of this world but encouraged by the righteousness, peace and joy that comes with being part of Your kingdom. We do not have to be anxious for anything because your peace guards our hearts and minds. We bless You and give You gory. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen!

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    Bonnie Kay Rimpson

    God has truly restored me after having a torn soul from broken relationships and even a divorce. After receiving Jesus as my Savior, God took me through a process of knowing my identity and loving myself so that I may love others. Now I am happily married to a man after God's own heart, who loves me with the love of God.

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