What I’ve learned from this experience is to never assume that I got it all figured out because God might have a different plan. Always be prepared for the enemy to attack at your most vulnerable times. Push past fear and stay strong to the end because the outcome is victory if you stay focused on God.
During my pregnancy all kind of circumstances were coming against me. For 1, I am no spring chicken, being 41 and pregnant is definitely different from being pregnant in your 20’s and even 30’s! Add 2 teenagers and 3 toddlers to the mix and exhaustion is the result. Because of my age, they sent me to more frequent and thorough ultrasounds. During these ultrasounds they noticed what they saw as a red flag with my baby’s kidneys, but all of the symptoms that would confirm their diagnosis weren’t present. They kept sending me for more ultrasounds and kept getting the same results. All the while, God gave me peace in knowing that my baby was okay and I didn’t need to fear. The doctor was confused by the inconsistencies with the ultrasound picture not matching the other things that this diagnosis should cause. You see, sometimes things look one way in the natural, but God has everything lined up according to His Word! At my last ultrasound about a month before delivery the doctor consulted a colleague, and they determined that there was nothing wrong with my baby! Hallelujah!!!
Just around 3 weeks before delivery, I was taking the kids for a fun day about 40 minutes away from home. Right before turning into the street that would lead us there, a car smashed into me. This caused my car to spin out and scared me immensely. Not only was I 37 weeks pregnant, but I also had all 5 of my other children in the car with me. Before leaving on our trip, the Holy Spirit led me to pray over our travels. I pleaded the blood of Jesus over us, the car, and the roads. I asked that the angels be encamped around us. The enemy was trying to take me and all my seed out! Although we were still hit, I believe that my prayer protected us from greater danger. The air bags didn’t go off which was good for my pregnant belly. All the children were secure in their seatbelts. We all suffered neck and back pain, but had no life threatening injuries. God kept us! Thank You Jesus!
Coming closer to my time of giving birth, my doctor warned me of getting to the hospital quickly. With this being my 6th child, he was concerned that the baby would come quickly. This led to I false alarm where I had to be sent home. I was so concerned because my husband commutes back and forth to work via train and I wasn’t sure if he would make it to the hospital if I went into labor. I know I was getting on his nerves with worry as it got closer. I started experiencing a weird numbing feeling in my belly that I had never felt before. Prior to this I was having consistent contractions but they didn’t really feel that strong. I didn’t know what to do. I started to fear the numbness meant that there was something wrong. My husband stayed home from work and we went to the hospital. When they monitored my contractions, the nurse couldn’t believe that I wasn’t feeling them. I was 3 centimeters dilated when I got to the hospital. The baby was fine and the contractions were coming consistently, but I wasn’t opening any further which was unusual for me because I normally go pretty quickly once I reach that point. They had me walk the hallways. The numbness left and I now felt the contractions, but I still wasn’t opening. They doctor recommended that I be induced since my due date was 5 days away, my contractions were consistent, and my husband was with me. My ultrasounds and measurements also indicated that this baby was going to be my biggest yet and it would be best to deliver now. I reluctantly agreed and expressed my want for the epidural. Understand, I have a fear of the epidural, but the pain from natural birth without meds (I experienced this twice) superseded this fear. I have a slight curve in my lower spine but it has never been an issue. This time, the anesthesiologist had a hard time getting around this curve. He punctured my back at least 5 times before achieving his target. In doing this, my spinal fluid leaked and medicine went where it wasn’t intended causing complete numbness to my lower body and extreme neck/head pain. I was completely freaking out because I couldn’t feel my toes or move my legs. I couldn’t imagine how I was going to push. They held off on giving me medicine through the epidural and waited for the effects of the leak to wear off (eventually it did). Right after the epidural my blood pressure dropped extremely low and I felt like I was drifting into death (dramatic, I know, but it is how I felt). I was explaining as I was drifting. They had to put me on oxygen and give me several doses of medicine to bring my pressure back up. It finally regulated and they started the induction meds.
I was on the induction meds for hours and still remained only 3 centimeters dilated. So much for an easy deliver with the baby slipping out! They had to turn up the meds as high as allowed and wait to see what happens. The nurse told me that they may have to send me home as a failed induction! I was NOT going home without a baby after all it took to get me there! I prayed and waited. The doctor couldn’t believe what was happening. 26 hours later, which was more than double the time that I have ever labored, I gave birth to my second smallest baby that I ever had. The effects of my spinal fluid leak were still in full speed. The neck/head pain would not let up. The fast option of curing my pain was to get a blood patch. This is when they give you another epidural, but inject your own blood into the area to stop the spinal fluid from leaking. The other option that may or may not work was to take in a lot of caffeine and fluids. I chose the 2nd option, but it didn’t work. It was Thanksgiving and I wanted to go home. They wouldn’t let me leave until I showed signs of relief. I had to endure the very thing that hurt me in order to get better. Talk about ironic. I let them do it and almost instantly started feeling better.
Everything seemed to go wrong. Everything was different then everyone expected. Nothing seemed to make sense. But at God’s perfect time, He gave me a perfect reward! He gave me His creation, a precious baby girl, my Joy! Regardless of how we feel about the way things are going, when we love God, it all works out.
28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.
I pray this encourages somebody that is going through a rough season. Things may look like everything is wrong, but God knows what He is doing. Continue to trust Him. Continue to press into the finish. The end result will be more beautiful than expected!
Father, we thank You for Your unfailing love. We thank You that You are a rewarder of those who diligently seek You. Forgive us for seeking our own plans and forgetting to include You. Show us how to seek You first and be led by the Spirit. Help us not look at our circumstances and get discouraged or depressed even when everything looks opposite of what we think it should. Help us not to give up, but finish with prayer, courage and faith as our weapons. Help us overcome our obstacles and recover from our disappointments according to Your Word. Thank You for Your perfect timing that brings beauty to our purpose. We know we have victory in You. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen!