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SECRET GARDEN

Love Yourself!

5/27/2016

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Every once in a while there maybe seasons in our marriages where we don’t feel loved to the extent that we feel that we deserve. We might feel distant, misunderstood, or unappreciated. While many factors can be the cause of these type of feelings, I’d like to address the part that we have control over ourselves.
 
People can only love you in the degree that they love themselves and vice versa!
 Seek God’s love, get deliverance, then work on relationships!
 LOVE YOURSELF HOW YOU WANT OTHERS TO LOVE YOU!
 
Leviticus 19:18 Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the LORD.
 ​
Usually at the times when I feel the most neglected in love, distant, and unappreciated; those are the times when I’m not really happy with myself. I have gotten too busy with everyday life and denied myself the things that keep my purpose alive. I am like Mary in the story of Martha and Mary when Jesus came to their house (Luke 10:38-42). I am a worshipper and would rather stay at His feet then do busy work. When I don’t take the time to get into intimacy with God, I become extremely frustrated. This is because in worship, I hear the voice of God, He shows me things, and I feel the love of His presence. This is uniquely tied to my purpose and charges who I am. I have to stay in fellowship with God. My husband can’t replace the presence of Jesus. In His presence, I know who I am and can perfectly love myself. In return, my husband can fully love me because I am being who God called me to be.
I know there is work that needs to be done. I can’t neglect my home, my husband, my kids, or other natural responsibilities, but I have to stay in balance or frustration fills my home affecting everybody.
 
What is your purpose? What charges your spirit? What do you do that makes you feel the love of God causing you to love yourself? Are you doing those things? Next time you are feeling unloved. Ask yourself these questions. Evaluate yourself first and bring those things to Jesus. Let Him love on you and bring you back to a place of self-love. It will open up a door for you to love more deeply and for your spouse to love you more as well.  
 
Mark 12:29-31 (NKJV)
29 Jesus answered him, “The first of all the commandments is: ‘Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one.  30 And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’[a] This is the first commandment.[b]  31 And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’[c] There is no other commandment greater than these.”
 
God has to be first. When God is first we know His love. We can love ourselves and our neighbor (or spouse) in the same way. Without God it is impossible to love completely. When we bring our emptiness to God, he is sure to fill it with His love. He will heal every broken place and deliver every unclean place. He is Lord over our lives and over our marriages. He is the head coach of our team, without him we have no direction, instruction, or encouragement.
 
So today, let’s evaluate how we feel about ourselves before making our spouses responsible for our emotions. Let’s reconnect with our first love and know that we are loved with an everlasting love. Let’s be reminded of who God says we are and what He has called us to do.
 
Father, we thank You for Your everlasting love. Forgive us for getting too busy to connect with You and blaming others for the way that we feel about ourselves. Show us how to love you completely so we may love ourselves and in return love our spouse in the same way. Heal our hearts and deliver us from anything that is hindering how we love or receive love. We put You first and ask You to resurrect our purpose and establish our identity in You. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen!
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Share Everything!

5/20/2016

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Being married to the person God sent you is a great blessing. It is wonderful to have someone to spend your life with and share everything with. The hard part is that you have to share everything with them, lol!
 

​I’m not talking about material things (although sometimes it’s nice to have something to yourself), but I’m talking about things in our soulish realm. Sharing our thoughts, feelings, desires, hurts, disappointments, fears, and dreams, can put us at a place of vulnerability that makes us feel uncomfortable. I’m no expert at marriage. I make mistakes every day and am learning as I go. One thing that I do know is that if we are not willing to share “everything” then there will be some type of confusion to pop up later. The quicker we express ourselves the better.  Our spouse can’t be our help if they don’t know what is wrong. Many frustrations can be avoided with proper communication.
 

Just because we both love God doesn’t mean that we don’t go through times of pain, heaviness, or even anger. We have to recognize the signals when we see a shift in the way our spouse is responding and immediately step in as an edifier. This is not always easy, especially when their attitude is altered, but God wants us to get over ourselves and come in times of weakness to bear our spouses burdens. We have to be quick to pray and speak life to the situation. We must give them hope instead of adding fuel to a destructive fire. When we pray, God will release His Word, His will, His mind and release His comfort and peace over the situation.  This will allow us to come into agreement and as one release glory to the Father.
 
 
 

Romans 15:1-6 (NKJV)
Bearing Others’ Burdens
15 We then who are strong ought to bear with the scruples of the weak, and not to please ourselves.  2 Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, leading to edification.  3 For even Christ did not please Himself; but as it is written, “The reproaches of those who reproached You fell on Me.”[a]  4 For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, that we through the patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope.  5 Now may the God of patience and comfort grant you to be like-minded toward one another, according to Christ Jesus,  6 that you may with one mind and one mouth glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.
 
 
 
Today I encourage you to endure times of weakness. Pray without ceasing over your marriage and listen for what God is saying. Watch as God quickly moves in your hearts towards one another to give Him glory! God loves both of you and wants to work it all out for your good.
 

Father, we thank You for giving us a lifetime helper in our spouse. Forgive us for keeping things to ourselves and not being an edifier when they needed it most.  We want to have one mind, bearing each other’s burdens, and giving You glory. Let The Holy Spirit show us when things are off and tell us what to pray and speak over our spouse. We want our marriage to honor You in all that we do. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen!
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Teamwork

5/13/2016

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​By nature, I am a pretty independent, do-it-yourself type of girl. Surrendering to God’s will for my life has been a process of chipping away at the pride that says “I don’t need any help”. Even at that, surrendering to the voice of God is way easier than surrendering to the voice of my husband. I’ve had to learn to trust that God speaks to him too and that God gave him to me to lead. This doesn’t mean that my husband doesn’t consult me and listen to my ideas, it just means that I was not designed to do everything myself.
 
 

Ephesians 5:20-22 (NKJV)
20 giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ,  21 submitting to one another in the fear of God.[a]
Marriage—Christ and the Church
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
 
 
During our move I was feeling a little sad because I wanted to be involved in the painting and preparing the house. My husband took off work and worked endlessly to make the house move-in-ready. It’s not that I didn’t think that he could do it, there is still a part of me that not only wants to be involved (which is okay), but also wants to supervise to make sure everything is right (which is not okay). There is a spirit of perfection that comes in to sometimes bother me causing me not to be satisfied with what is going on around me.  I want my way! Lord help me!  I know that God’s way is always better than mine, but sometimes it takes me a minute to realize when I’m not in alignment.
 
 

Isaiah 55:8-9(NKJV)
8 “For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord.
9 “For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts.
 
 
 
So while my husband got to “play” in our new house, I had to stay at the old house trying to pack while tending to our five children. I know that this is honorable and important, but I didn’t feel like I was a part of transitioning to our new house. I am with the kids every day and with three toddlers it is almost impossible to be extra productive.
 
 
Despite my feelings, my husband never suggests that my work is less important or easier than his. In fact, he always tells people that my job is harder than his. He goes out of his way to let me know how he appreciates everything that I do.
 
 

Proverbs 31:30(NKJV)
30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
 
 
Marriage is a team. Each one is different. I am blessed to be able to stay home with my children. Although sometimes I feel a desire to get away into the “real world”, I know this time when they are young will go by quickly. God designed my marriage to work this way. He is teaching me new levels of trust and surrender every day. He is teaching me to be satisfied and find contentment in every situation. He is teaching me that I don’t have to be “in control” of every situation (we really don’t have control anyway, God does).
 
 

Philippians 4:11(NKJV)
11 Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content:
 
 
 
If I didn’t stay home with the children, my husband wouldn’t be able to work the job that he loves (it’s too demanding).  If my husband didn’t work the job that he has, it wouldn’t be possible (financially) for me to stay home. It works for us because God put us together as a team. As long as we stay in position and go over the playbook together (communication), then each move we make flows smoothly. If we get distracted and start trying to step into another position, then we drop the ball. Sometimes we feel like our position is not as important as the other, but that is just a lie that the enemy tells to keep us from working together. Know your position. Know your season. Time goes by quickly. When you stay in alignment with God’s plan, then surely you will prosper!
 
 
 
Father, we thank You for our marriage. We thank You that You put us together as a perfect team. Forgive us for pride and discontentment that keeps us from staying in position. Help us know our role and how You designed our marriage to flow. We want to be in alignment with the purpose that You have for our marriage.  Deliver us from the things that keep our marriage from prospering. Grow us in new levels of love trust and faith. Make us examples of marriage that reflect You and Your church. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen!
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    Bonnie Kay Rimpson

    God has truly restored me after having a torn soul from broken relationships and even a divorce. After receiving Jesus as my Savior, God took me through a process of knowing my identity and loving myself so that I may love others. Now I am happily married to a man after God's own heart, who loves me with the love of God.

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